When To End A Relationship

If you're wondering when to end a relationship, then you're faced with a hard decision. After you've invested time with another person, it's never easy to say goodbye. This is true if you've been together 3 months, 3 years, or more. But sometimes learning when to end your relationship is the best thing you can do for both of you.

If you really love the person you're with, you might wonder when to end a relationship and why. You might think that just because you love him or her, you should stay and work things out. And very often it is worth a try.

Many people give up on their relationships before they've really tried to fix them. Because it's difficult, they throw in the towel instead of working on their problems. This is unfortunate, because many people could probably be happy together if only they weren't afraid to try.

And other people have problem after problem and keeping working hard when most people think they should just give up. It's as if these people are gluttons for punishment. Their partner keeps cheating on them and they keep taking him back. Or their partner keeps making other mistakes and letting them down.

It seems they don't know when to end a relationship. But usually it's that they're simply afraid of being alone and moving on.

There are obvious situations that should tell you when to end a relationship. If your partner is abusive, it's time to get out, no excuses. If you don't feel safe, even down to feeling like you'll have something to eat and be secure, then you should move on.

Other things are less sure. If your partner has cheated, for instance, does that always mean itís time to leave? Some people can get past one mistake like that. They sometimes end up with a stronger relationship after the affair.

But more often they really never get past the betrayal. Even if it never happens again, the one who was cheated on can't let go of the hurt. And the one who cheated will eventually get tired of the suspicion and guilt.

If there has been cheating in your relationship, it's not easy to decide if it should end. You should really talk about everything involved. From trust to fear of it happening again, it should all be put on the table in an honest discussion.

How about if you feel like cheating? If you have a really strong desire to be with someone else, should you end it? These types of feelings are natural. You can even have fantasies about other people. But if you're constantly thinking that you'd be better of with someone else, maybe you really would be.

If you love your partner and you've tried different ways of working it out, step back. How have you really tried?  For how long? When to end a relationship isn't always easy to see, but if you know you've done everything and it's still not working, it may be time to go.

To Win Back An Ex Avoid Making These Two Mistakes

Why is it sometimes so difficult to win back an ex?  No doubt you've tried your best to get your love back, but everything you've tried so far has ended in failure and now you're desperate and frustrated.

Well the real answer of why it's difficult to win back an ex is really two fold.  The first point is that once you've been dumped by someone you're still in love with the balance of power immediately shifts their way.  The second point is that most people have no real idea what to do to successfully get back with someone they love and end up spending a great deal of time racing around doing all the wrong things.

Truth is, once your ex has the upper hand in a relationship you can find yourself forever trying to catch up to them and both of you know it. If your ex knows that you want them back often times they will make you work to get them back and they will often enjoy the drama of putting you through getting them back.  Plainly put, they have something that you desperately want and boy do they know it.

To win back an ex then, play it cool!  You don't have to declare straight away to your ex that you want them back.  You simply keep that intention to yourself and make every effort to distance yourself from them.

If you're reading this because you feel you know that your love is about to break up with you, then when the break up comes agree to it calmly and rationally and let them go.  Don't give them a clue that you desperately want them to stay.

When they've gone, work at keeping yourself busy and occupied with other things that are not centered around your ex and your relationship.  Don't make yourself readily available to them to chat or do favors for them.  If they call, be polite, chat for a couple of minutes, but make it clear you're busy and have places to go.

Here's a warning for you!  Many people faced with trying to distance themselves from their exs simply can't do it!  They mistakenly believe that if they run around doing favors for their exs that their ex will see them as someone they need.  They think they will be able to prove and show their exs how much they love them by being there for them!  Wrong!  This seldom works because all that happens is that the ex either gets fed up with them hanging around in their life or the ex will start to take advantage.  So don't fall into that trap!

Keep your distance and what will begin to happen is that you will feel the power naturally swing your way and you will be in a far better position to win back ex.

**** P.S.  My friend Travis put together a quick video that will give you a few more great tips to get your ex back here.   This guy really knows his stuff... it will really help you.  Check it out now. 

I Have An Ex Boyfriend To Get Back How Do I Go About It

If you have an ex boyfriend to get back, pretty much you're no doubt struggling to keep your composure and your dignity!  Well the honest truth is that if you fail to hold onto to your composure and your dignity, then any chance of getting your ex boyfriend back will probably be lost.

So, it's time to stop acting like a pouting princess and instead start behaving like a responsible and mature young woman who knows her own mind and is capable of making tough decisions.

Now, discovering that you have an ex boyfriend to get back means you're really going to need to look at whatever it was that caused the split between the two of you in the first place.  If you dumped him on a whim because of something that he did and you have now put what happened into perspective, then without a doubt, you're going to have to do some apologizing and back peddling.  So take a deep breath, stay calm and go and see him.  Tell him that you have had time to think and you're now ready to forgive and forget.  Not only that, you would  also like to apologize for any over reaction on your part. With any luck that will be the end of the rift and you will have succeeded in getting him back.

However, if there is more to it or he doesn't accept your apology and you find you still have an ex boyfriend to get back, then you're going to have to do some more work.

Look at yourself!  If you find yourself constantly in turmoil with your love life, then take a long hard look at what might be causing the problem.  If you have issues about your own behavior that has caused comments from others or that you're not happy with, then face them.  Truth is, if you are going to make a success of this relationship or any future relationship, then you have to take the long hard walk and sort yourself out.

Here are some clues!  Avoid making decisions when you're emotional.  You will probably make a ton of wrong decisions if you are not calm and have not thought through outcomes and consequences.   Especially true, if you have an ex boyfriend to get back, because emotions and gestures are definitely the wrong approach to take to a love life in turmoil.

So, think clearly and take your time about your approach to win him back.  Present him with valid and tangible reasons why this time around the relationship will be different and so stand a chance of working.  At all costs, dump the pouting princess and reveal to him a grown up and capable young woman he can have some fun with.

To Win Ex Boyfriend Back You Might Need To Work On Yourself

So you've just heard through friends that your ex boyfriend, who you've never really got over, is dating someone else and hearing it cuts deep.  Your first thought is that you must win ex boyfriend back before he gets too serious with this other girl.

Well take it easy and don't go rushing head long into this, what you have on your side that the current girlfriend does not have is history!  In your effort to win ex boyfriend back remember, history can sometimes over ride everything else and take precedence. 

Now think about that history, those good times with your ex boyfriend. How good were they really, because clearly something went terribly wrong.  With time we often slide on the old rose colored spectacles.  So be sure that your memories are grounded in reality and not fantasy. 

If you're not sure, before you go full on trying to win ex boyfriend back, ask a good friend who will tell you the truth and not only what you want to hear. Weigh up what your friend says and what you honestly know and feel and then make your decision about what you want to do.

If what you discover is that certain aspects of your behavior were primarily to blame for the break down in your ex relationship, then you need to find ways of amending  that behavior.  There's no point in trying to get back together with your ex if the reason he left you is still staring you both in the face.  So deal with what needs to be dealt with on your part before you make any real attempt at reconciliation. 

Assuming that you decide to go ahead and try and get your ex boyfriend back, you then need to make contact with him.  Call him and ask if you can meet up with him somewhere neutral.  Don't let it sound as though you are going to drop anything too heavy on him because you don't want to frighten him off at this point.

To win ex boyfriend back make sure that when you meet him, you explain to him that you have thought long and hard about what happened in your relationship. You have done some work and sorted yourself out and you have found that you still have really strong feelings for him.  Tell him you'd like another chance.

Give him the space to explain how he feels and what he wants.  Don't get emotional or angry if you don't hear what you want to hear.  If you need to give him time to think things over, then do that.  Don't rush him, just leave and wait for him to call you.  With any luck, you'll get the call you want and you'll be back together.

How To Get Lover Back Even If You Made Mistakes

It is quite common for the person left to not really realize they are deeply in love with their ex until the ex has left the relationship.  If this is you, then you no doubt want to discover how to get lover back before it's too late.  But what you must not do is to allow the fact that you have made some mistakes to stop you in your attempt.  It is very well documented that most of the relationships that break up could very easily be put back together again, if only one of those involved actually tried.  So try!

There are some basic steps that you can take when you're looking into how to get lover back, you simply have to make sure that you get the details of these steps correct and that you spend a sufficient amount of time going through each step. How much time, varies from situation to situation and the real truth is that only you can judge the time that you think you might need.

If the relationship was a tumultuous up and down messy emotional one, then it is going to need a longer time to get over the initial mess of the break up.  Longer than if your relationship was stable and less exacting.  So be honest with yourself and be clear about what kind of relationship you had with your ex, because the truth right here will go a long way to helping you figure out how to get lover back.

A clue is that most people need at least a month on their own without contact with their ex to start the healing process.  Don't try and bypass this alone time because without it most attempts at how to get lover back fail. 

You are going to spend your alone time looking at the mistakes that you might have made and you are going to forgive yourself for those mistakes.  If you try and get back with your ex and you have not forgive yourself, then how is it possible for your ex to fully forgive you.  So be kind to yourself, accept your fallibility and forgive yourself.

That doesn't mean that you just draw a line under any mistakes that you may have made and forget about them.  It means that you should then go on to figuring out how you can avoid such mistakes in the future, if the same or similar situations arise.  Because you really do not want to get into a cycle of the same old things that keep on happening.

Once you're confident that you have the emotions and the reasons behind your mistakes sorted out, you are then ready to go ahead and actually make contact with your ex and ask to talk to them.

If you want even more actionable steps that you can take right now to get your ex back then you owe it to your self to check out this great site that my friend Travis built for you here.

To Win Back Love, Forget Your Heart and Use Your Head

If you're serious about finding a way to win back love, then it means you're going to have to start using your head and stop following your heart!  It really is that simple.

So let's look at this!  Your heart is no doubt telling you to drop everything, chase down your ex and make them listen to what you have to say, whether they want to or not.  You heart has convinced you that all your ex has to do is to hear and understand just how much you miss, love and want them back and your ex will forget about everything that went wrong take you back on the spot!  Wrong!

To win back love your head would never tell you to do any of that, instead your head would say back off, get a grip and take your time.  Guess which one you should be listening to!  Yep, your head!

So, leave your ex alone, don't call them, don't try to accidentally bump into them wherever you know they hang out and don't send them love notes ñ in short make no attempt whatsoever to contact them.

By contacting them, you're making yourself appear desperate, a pain in the butt and someone that no right minded person would even want to be around never mind consider dating again.  Like a diamond that increases in value the rarer it is, where your ex is concerned, aim to be rare!  Let your ex wonder where you are and why they haven't heard from you and just like that they will want to hear from you and see you.

If you're stuck with a problem and the first person you would usually call is your ex, then you're going to have to figure out how to solve that problem yourself.  Not only does this enhance your standing with your ex, because they realize that you can cope on your own, but it also enhances your own standing in your own head.  If you figure out how to cook that favorite meal that your ex used to cook for you ñ you realize you can cope!  If you figure out how to change the oil in your car ñ again you realize that you can cope!

How can You Tell If You Are In A Toxic Relationship

How can you tell if you are in a toxic relationship?  Here are some clues:

• Your partner puts you down (verbally) in front of others
• While your partner says they love you, their actions don't back it up.
• Your partner is controlling, reading your mail or "showing up" at places you are just to "check up" on you. 
• Your partner tries to make you dependent on them.
• You have changed things about yourself to please them.

Toxic people make you feel ill just being around them.  So, why would anyone end up in a toxic relationship?  Why would anyone want to be with someone who makes them feel emotionally or physically harmed?

A toxic relationship has a cycle.  There's a honeymoon period, followed by a blow up, followed by a reconciliation, at which point the cycle begins anew.

When you first meet a new partner, you are obviously in the honeymoon stage.  It is not until they've sucked you in further that you realize that you are in a toxic relationship.  At that point, it is difficult to get out.

One reason is that many people in toxic relationships grow up in toxic homes.  As a result, they replicate the patterns of their childhood without even knowing they're doing it.  And, they may not know any better.  Others believe they do not deserve happiness.  Still others find that they enjoy taking care of people.

But the first step in getting out and staying out of toxic relationships is to realize that you do have choices.  Often people who stay in these couples have low self esteem or suffer from depression. 

Once you realize that you have choices, the next step is to start standing up for yourself.  In most toxic relationships, the toxic partner has taught you that it is all your fault.  Once you buy into this,  it can be very difficult to either walk away from the relationship or set new limits that can heal the relationship.

For some people, working in therapy groups can help them either get out of or redefine these horrible relationships. 

The good news is that some people are able to break the cycles of toxic relationships.  Some of them leave the relationship and form new, healthier bonds.

But others are actually able to repair their relationship and stay in it.

The truth is that most relationships are able to be salvaged.  Sometimes it takes a little space.  Other times, it takes counseling.  But if both partners make an attempt, it is possible to renew the bonds in a healthy way.

The first thing you need to decide is that the relationship must improve or you're willing to walk away.  If you aren't willing to walk away, you'll never be able to heal that which divides you. 

Once you have liberated yourself from the dependency that is at the core of a toxic relationship, you can start to assert what you need from the connection.  Don't nag the other person.  Simply say 'I need your support," "I need your love,"or "I need your truthful opinion."

If you don't get what you need, the other person should know that you're prepared to walk.

A healthy relationship is a two way street.  In a toxic relationship, the street is only going one way.  You have the power to change that, but you must take the power into your own hands.